Life Coach - Quarterly Report, Part 2

(In last week's article, Terri had found Mo's Life Coach Quarterly Report. It was less than flattering and, according to Terri, not completely accurate. We join them now as a rather chubby Mo responds to Terri's call.)

Mo snorted. I ignored her rude response and slammed the paper on the table beside her.

Me: What is this?

Mo: My report. I'm a professional, you know. I am obligated to keep a record of our work together.

Me: Right. I suppose you consider this to be your unbiased report?

Mo: Of course. It wouldn't be professional if it was biased.

Me: Okay. You do remember, these goals were for the whole year. They didn't have to be met all at once. I mean, look at my goal for cleaning the house. You'll have to admit, I've done very well on this one. I keep up with the laundry, the dishes, I'm working on keeping the floors clean. We've done quite a lot of decluttering.

Mo: And the stack of papers by the exercise bicycle?

Me: I have till the end of December to deal with them.

Mo: Right. Okay, we'll go for another one. How about exercising? You didn't get up and do yoga every morning as we had arranged.

Me: YOU had arranged that one. I gave it a go and learned that doing yoga before my medication kicks in doesn't work very well. Life also kicked into high gear. I had to adapt my exercising goals to fit in with all the craziness in my life. I've been taking walks, going to yoga class and dance class, and trying to do simple yoga exercises while I'm doing chores. Oh, and my doctor is very happy with how I'm doing. No medication changes for my Parkinson's.

Mo: Impressive. I'll give you full credit for adapting, but you get counted down for not communicating this with your Coach.

Me: If you'd been around more...

Mo: Yeah, yeah. Let's get to the important stuff here. How about nutrition? I hope you're not going to make excuses for that, are you?

Me: No. I didn't do well at all with that one. I'll admit it. When life gets a little stressful, I hit the chocolate.

Mo: (reading from her list) ...and cookies and ice cream and Baileys and brownies. Did I miss anything?

Me: Considering you are twice the fairy you were the last time I saw you, I don't think so. To look at you, one might think you had stayed at Ronald McDonald House with us over Easter. ...uh... did you?

Mo: I thought I'd better keep an eye on you, and it's a good thing I did! Just think what trouble you'd be in now, if I hadn't kept the elevators busy, giving you a good reason to take the stairs.

Me: Thanks, but it was hardly necessary. I was worried enough about the effects of all the wonderful desserts the volunteers made for us and left in the kitchen. We could get chocolate any time of the day or night.

Mo: We sure could! (A wistful expression had come over her) The Brownies worked hard baking those chocolate chip cookies. It would have been mean to not eat them.

Me: My thoughts exactly.

Mo: How about we sit down and write these goals again. It's easy to see we've got work to do. 

Me: Sounds good. I don't suppose you'd like....

Mo: Some ice cream with Bailey's on top? I thought you'd never ask!